7 signs you aren’t just pregnant, but really pregnant

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posted in Pregnancy

When I first found out I was pregnant I was pretty curious about what was to come. Would I be sick in bed for months? Eating strange food combinations like potato chips and chocolate sauce? Forgetting everything from my last name to where I put my keys?

I was pleasantly surprised to find that I felt pretty normal all through the early months. No morning sickness, no food cravings, and while my husband may disagree, I don’t think “pregnancy brain” has struck too hard (but maybe I just don’t know?)!

Now that I’m just weeks away from delivering this bundle of joy,however,  the real pregnancy has finally kicked in. No longer do I feel like my normal self, I’m officially, really pregnant. Here are a few signs you might be too.

1. Clothing decisions are made based on  pure convenience.

Does it fit? Is it clean? It will work! (Even if it’s just kind of clean. You can’t see most of your stomach when you look down anyway!) In fact, if I’m home you can pretty much guarantee I’m wearing my husband’s boxer shorts and t-shirts. I may never go back!

2. You love nothing more than cancelling plans.

Don’t feel like driving to meet friends for dinner? Sorry, I’m just really pregnant. I’d love to come to your party! Of course, I’ll have to see how I’m feeling when the day arrives (Spoiler alert, I’m just really pregnant right now so I don’t think I can make it!). Social obligations just met their match! My husband is really benefiting too. “My wife’s just really pregnant right now, so I don’t know if I should leave her at home alone” has been used quite often too.

3. There’s a worn path between your bed and the bathroom.

I remember thinking that pregnant women always having to use the bathroom had to be an exaggeration. I was wrong. I’m in a constant state of either entering or exiting the bathroom these days! And can we all just agree that pregnant women need their own stalls or can just skip the line when it comes to public restrooms?

4. Your body just does weird stuff.

Now maybe your body’s been doing weird stuff since day one, but if not, it’s probably starting soon. That pregnant “waddle”? I literally try to walk normal and cannot. Some mornings when I wake up one hand is completely swollen and feels like I have arthritis. Heartburn keeps me up at night, regardless of what I’ve eaten. Who knows what tomorrow will bring?

I think it’s safe to say I took my wedding ring off just in time!

5. Forget bending over.

Painting my toe nails, even putting on shoes has become a feat! (I’m sure the day is coming when I have to have help.) Last week I was trying to decide between two different shirts to wear and one fell on the floor. Decision made.

6. You forgot what it’s like to be cold.

I’m turning up the fan and sweating through the sheets. My husband on the other hand is wrapped in blankets and shivering. I’m actually excited about the money we’ll save over the next month on our heat bill!

7. You’ve never been more excited and terrified at the same time.

While I’m dying to hold this baby (it would be nice to meet the kid kicking me in the ribs constantly), I’m also really trying to figure out how to avoid actually having to deliver it. It’s kind of like taking a trip to outer space. Sure, you get to take part in something special, it’s an event not everyone will get to experience. However, first you have to strap yourself to a missile: cervix, we have a problem.